I’m Just Saying

A Guide to Maintaining Civil Discourse
in an Increasingly Divided World

Order Now!
Google play buttonAudio books buttonBarnes and noble logoRakuten kobo logoAmazon logoApple books logoB logoBooks and a million logo

I’m Just Saying is not just a word of warning about the emerging Frankenstein of intolerance, but it is also an earnest, tech-savvy, entrepreneurially minded, morally conscientious assay at fashioning a democratic, tolerant, self-aware, and self-critical citizenry—the very foundation of an enduring democracy.”

Abbas Milani
Co-Director of the Iran Democracy Project at the Hoover Institution
WSJ award badgeBarnes and noble award badge
Barnes and noble award badge
Amazon award badge
Amazon award badge
Amazon award badge
Amazon award badge
Amazon award badge
Amazon award badge
Amazon award badge
Amazon award badge
I'm Just Saying book cover

I’m Just Saying

A Guide to Maintaining Civil Discourse
in an Increasingly Divided World

I'm Just Saying book cover
WSJ badgeBook badge
Book badge
Book badge
Book badge
Book badge
Book badge
Book badge
Book badge
Book badge
Book badge
Order Now!
Book download linkBook download linkBook download linkBook download linkBook download linkBook download linkBook download linkBook download link

I’m Just Saying is not just a word of warning about the emerging Frankenstein of intolerance, but it is also an earnest, tech-savvy, entrepreneurially minded, morally conscientious assay at fashioning a democratic, tolerant, self-aware, and self-critical citizenry—the very foundation of an enduring democracy.”

Abbas Milani
Co-Director of the Iran Democracy Project at the Hoover Institution
Book badgeBook badge

Let’s talk about Discourse

Have you ever been in a conversation that, after volleying back and forth, ended with the words, “I’m just saying . . .”? Usually, this signals frustration, that the discussion has reached a dead end, that you haven’t made your point - and may even leave you feeling that your relationship with the other person has changed for the worse.

In I’m Just Saying, I show that, although challenging conversations can be unpleasant, they can also help us grow. I use contemporary case studies and personal experience to teach you how to have constructive conversations by engaging in civil discourse—the idea that good-faith actors can reach consensus on any opinion-based disagreement. Along the way, I answer all the questions you’ve had about discourse, and teach my tricks to become a better conversation partner.

Civil discourse, an essential part of democracy, is becoming rare in today's digital age. I’m Just Saying examines discourse's successes and the ways to rebuild it. Drawing from history, popular culture, and personal anecdotes, this book promotes effective civil discourse by providing practical advice and strategies for respect. Through my stories and advice, I’m Just Saying offers insight and tools for politeness in a divided world.

10 Tools This Book Will Teach You

10 Tools This Book Will
Teach you

1
How to use self-reflection to address your own biases
3
How to see when unclear intent can be worse than ill intent when practicing discourse
5
How to embrace conflict in collaborative discussions to grow
7
How to grow trust and faith differently and when to depend on each
9
How to help others around you be more civil in their discourse
2
Ways to find common ground with any discussion partner
4
Lessons from Japanese philosophy to help with focus and patience
6
Tips for examining your own tone and adjusting for many speaking situations
8
Exercises for being a more active, attentive listener
10
Clues for avoiding poor discourse and disengaging from trolls
1
How to use self-reflection to address your own biases
2
Ways to find common ground with any discussion partner
3
How to see when unclear intent can be worse than ill intent when practicing discourse
4
Lessons from Japanese philosophy to help with focus and patience
5
How to embrace conflict in collaborative discussions to grow
6
Tips for examining your own tone and adjusting for many speaking situations
7
How to grow trust and faith differently and when to depend on each
8
Exercises for being a more active, attentive listener
9
How to help others around you be more civil in their discourse
10
Clues for avoiding poor discourse and disengaging from trolls

Get Your Copy of I’m Just Saying

What people are saying

"I'm Just Saying by Milan Kordestani is an essential guide for effective, smooth and successful communication in today's times. One of the book's best parts, in my opinion, is the one dealing with active listening. By "active listening" the author means truly listening and understanding the meaning behind the speaker's words and not just hearing the words that are being spoken. Milan Kordestani provides one with some useful strategies for practicing good listening skills. I find it really excellent that every chapter ends with a section of questions and answers that summarize its contents. This book will be the turning point for you if you sincerely want to become a better communicator. An outstanding read."

Left side button
Right slide button

Talking to the Blank page

I never realized writing a book would be such a long dialogue.

Maybe that’s because it’s my first, and I was naive. This book was over three years in the making, an evolving conversation between myself and the page. And a blank page is a terrible conversation partner.

During that time, the book constantly evolved, just as a conversation does. As I workshopped each chapter with friends, got each new set of edits from my team, or worked my way through the stoics one more time, my emphasis changed. Some chapters ballooned, others dissolved and were boxed for other projects. In the end, my wonderful editorial team and I went with our final statements, and words were made permanent in ink and pixels.

The end result, I’m Just Saying, is far more conversational than I ever expected. I became comfortable addressing common questions and describing my favorite strategies. That long conversation I had with the page made me better at discourse - precisely because practice makes perfect when it comes to improving our civil discourse skills!

And, in the end, that blank page was one of the best conversations I’ve had.

Ripped page
Ripped pageRipped pageRipped pageRipped pageRipped pageRipped pageRipped page
Ripped pageRipped pageRipped pageRipped pageRipped pageRipped pageRipped page
I'm Just Saying book coverI'm Just Saing book cover

Order Now! Available
In e-Book and Softcover

Join the conversation by choosing an e-book, audiobook, or hardcover, and learn how to improve your discourse in any situation!

Order Now!
Google play buttonAudio books buttonBarnes and noble logoRakuten kobo logoAmazon logoApple books logoB logoBooks and a million logo